A letter to Minister Grapperhaus

(the backstory: Minister Grapperhaus is the minister for safety and Justice, the one that imposed the Corona rules on us. He got married last week and was secretly photographed hugging friends, and all his 40 guests too close together… It came out today in the AD Den Haag newspaper, in Dutch)

Dear Minister Grapperhaus,

I wish I were like you.

I wish I could also don’t give a fuck about the rules that you yourself imposed on us. But I can’t, because I am not you (or a Minister or a politician). I wish I could also invite forty people to my book presentation, but I can’t, because, unlike you, I have to respect the rules.

In the paper AD from Den Haag, I read last week that “the spokesman for Mayor Van Zanen emphasized: “We are on top of it and will continue to monitor, but all restaurants and cafes are responsible themselves” and that “even if customers or entrepreneurs deliberately ignore the corona rules, the location can be closed.”

And that makes me angry, very angry. I have to do my presentation in the coldness of distance, 1,5 meters between each guest, which reduces the number of people in the room to eighteen. It is my responsibility, as the mayor of Den Haag said. It is our responsibility, but not yours, Minister.

I wish I could also go around shaking hands and hugging friends, but if I do that and someone comes positive after, I will be the one to blame for the place’s closure and high fines (390 euros a person). And I don’t want to do that to them, because I also work there. My livelihood depends on this place being open.

Aren’t you lucky, Minister Grapperhaus? You got a real bargain, instead of 390 euros multiplied by forty, you paid only for two. So lucky.

I wish I was a minister like you, Minister Grapperhaus, so I would not need to give a shit about this stupid rules that not even you or your coterie of cabinet members around you even believe in anymore. No one believes in your stupid rules anymore, but we must live by them unless we want to pay the fine, or even get arrested or our shops and places of work, closed.

But not you, Minister Grapperhaus. So lucky.

I wish you the best, Minister Grapperhaus, but know that, we, the citizens, also don’t give a shit about your rules. And our patience has a limit.

Enjoy your married life, Minister Grapperhaus.

Truly yours,

Cuca Esteves, a concerned citizen of your kingdom.